Make the Monday Blues Go Away !!

Ok so I am totally stealing this video from Dooce. She has it as a link on her daily chuck pictures.

I have watched it 5 times now and I am still in utter fits of laughter ! Watch the dogs face at 29 seconds!! Nearly wet myself dammit !

There is Nothing More I Dislike then Being Ignored

Seriously nothing pisses me off more then being ignored, not spoken to, not responded to or the silent treatment !

It honestly rattles my cage something chronic ! I am a communicator I need that form of communication and so when someone and others do not do the common act of communicating back then I get irritated to the max level.

I have no idea why it is like this with me but it is. I am pretty good at keeping my emotions and feelings and anger in check in almost all situations but when it comes to this little tiny issue I struggle not to scream about it.

I just have this belief that if someone makes the effort to speak to you then you simply make that effort back. I also believe that if you cannot be bothered to make that effort then you are way less a person for it. I know friends say to me if someone is that ignorant or rude then they are not worth your time anger or effort. That they are not worthy enough to know me as a person…but I cannot help it it gets my goat dammit.

So in the future people take the tip from me : If someone makes the effort to speak, email, text, call or write you a letter even make the effort to respond back its not hard and is just simple common manners dammit

Rowing Training Update

Ok so you know I wrote out the middle life crisis I turned 30 and the end of the world is coming list bucket list and that I started one of my items ,rowing !

Well here is a little update and possible sympathy post lol lol. I have changed my workout routines so that they are more geared to enhance my cardio and stamina plus muscle build up to match the rowing I want to do in the new year.,

Welllll let me tell you firstly my upper body which includes: my shoulders, upper back, upper arms, lower arms, hands, finger and boobs are all numb from the constant rowing. Numb to the point that I swear I am just a set of 36″ legs walking around freely.

I am rowing consistently 6 miles a day 3 -4 days a week. That’s a min of 18 damn miles a week people! On top of the weight training and endless back extensions. Now that being said the added bonus is that I have lost 5.5 pounds in 2 weeks just from starting up this new routine , the downside is if I keep obsessing like I am I will end up with shoulders like some eastern European women wrestler …not overly attractive

What Is also not attractive is the 17 shades of purple I am at the end of each rowing session and the fact that I lack any sort of coordination which makes for getting off the tiny rowing machine a constant source of amusement for the fellow gym goers . I swear to you they are all standing at the windows to see if I am coming in. When they do see me they are jump around gleefully thinking that they have at least 35 minutes of entertainment on its way to them !

All in all I am sticking to it and rather enjoying it AND MAYBE once I am in the rowing club there could be single eligible men there as well …. see there is sooo a silver lining to everything and another motive in the same breath lol lol

Gut Instincts

I have always in my life had a major constant going on and that is my gut instincts. I always trust them and they generally are right. I am of the belief that if it is my first immediate gut reaction and instinct then it is generally right or as close to right as I can get.

Its been like this for as long as I can remember. I have had great gut instincts about jobs and every single time it has worked out brilliantly, it really has. I seem to know within myself when something is right for me and my life.

it was like that when I first met my horse Sonnet. As much as it was a heart reaction it was in its very raw form a gut reaction that my 10 year dry spell of not finding that one that horse that I know will go far was offically over.

I have great gut reactions about situations that are sketchy and not good and I follow that reaction and run far far away from that.

My reactions have generally served me well and been tried tested and true ….but it appears recently in one aspect of my life they have been failing me completely and utterly miserably lol !

Yep …men….my gut reaction has lost its sparkle in regards to the opposite sex. I have no idea why !!!! Maybe its turning 30 and imminent fear of being alone. Maybe it is seeing friends and family members in great relationships …maybe its just seeing random happy couples walking down the street or driving to work together …maybe I am losing my gut reaction and my ability to make sound a decent judgement calls ??

 I keep thinking …” yep he is cool, he ticks boxes, has his shit together, good looking ,decent, and all the rest ” and then they turn out not to be. I do accept that every single person on the planet has a bad spell and a bad score card every so often. However more often then not I seem to be on the losing side then the winning side ???

 It is as much a gut reaction as a heart reaction and being able to trust both of these facts that make me who I am. But my trust is slowly beginning to waiver and I am not entirely sure how to get it back on track.

Yes I have a fear of being alone, yes I despise being single, yes I sleep terribly by myself and always have. Most importantly yes I second guess myself and wonder if I judged wrong now and if there is something internally wrong within myself and my ability to judge who is good and who is bad

For the life of me I am at a lose as to how to “fix” my gut reactions how to make them work properly at 100% capacity again for me. All I do know is that I need them to work again and I need them to help me start realizing when someone is for real and when someone is a flake and fake …way harder then you would ever possibly imagine

I have a Obsession With …..

This one is going to throw you guys …its a odd and peculiar obsession and one I have forever and ever !

I have a obsession with penguins and Hippo’s…yep waddling little birds and man eating river beasts. I cannot help it, I see one or the other and my little girl heart melts and I just cooo endlessly with a pure look of contentment on my face …sorry its weird but that’s me , deal with it.

If I could have a pet penguin or a pet baby hippo I do believe my life could very possibly be complete. I would so name the penguin Percy and he would likely live in my bath tub ( which is completely normal people penguins love bath tubs OK !?) and I would feed him endless supplies of mackerel ( the really stink fish of the water world )

If I could have a pet baby ( I say baby due to the fact that a full grown adult would crush me with his massive death and play with the dead broken body lol ) hippo his name would be Harry ,….. I am still debating as to where I would have him live but I do know I would totally write Coach and have them make him a dog style harness hippo sized  ( coach being my mecca for all things handbag,scarf AND strangely pet collar related) He would be the hippest most fashion forward hippo

Yep so there you go I am strange I obsess about penguins and hippo’s and hell yes I am single ….its all becoming very clear now I think

Hey Lurkers …Yep Talking to you ! :-)

 So I know your visiting I can see your countries flag there in the side bar ( which is soooo freakin cool by the way ! )

So thanks for the visit but drop me a line make a comment ! I promise you I will not bite and scare you …cross my heart !

I have had visits from some really off the wall places recently so I want to hear from you !! I can see which posts you read and which ones get read the most as well….seriously say hi even …yes I am attention starved sorry ! lol

Lest We Forget

 Today is the day you stop you honor and you recognize those who have fought died and lived for your country. Today is the day you remember the fallen soldiers in all wars fought for our country.

I have always had a connection with November 11th. I have grandfathers who fought in World War 2 for the British and parents who were bothin the Military. I have a sister who although not a solider is directly linked through her job with the current war in Afghanistan. I have a connection with this day like I believe every single person does.

I have a tough time listening to the news this time of year as there are endless stories of grieving families,mothers,wives,husbands,children,fathers for their lost sons and daughters. I have driven into work for the last 2 days in floods of tears as they have retold their fallen soldiers story on the radio for all to hear.

It puts my life into perspective very clearly. It makes my worries and fears seems somewhat small in compression. SO what if I have felt let down or somewhat heart broken , that is nothing to compare to the loss of a loved one to a war thousands of miles away. It makes me grateful and thankful to know that they are willing to sacrifice themselves in such a deadly and terrifying way.

Solders like Sergeant Shane Hank Stachnik who was killed in Afghanistan on September 3 2006. Who’s mother has been chosen as this years Silver Cross Mother . I listened to her speak on the radio yesterday on the way into work. Just before hearing the news piece I was wrapped up in my own world my own issues about life and men and work and being hurt. The minute I heard her voice and telling her sons story it was gone I stopped worrying and obsessing about my own life and started listening to a women who has lost her baby to a war thousands of miles away and I cried endlessly. SHe recounted getting a call at 5 am in the morning from the local RCMP. They had to call her rather then the army Chaplin and men who were meant to tell her that her son was lost forever because she lived out in the country and they could not find their way there. She asked “Is Shane ok ?” to which they said ” Ma’am we need to see you now” she obviously knew at that point that her son was dead and lost forever. She said ”its not like they were calling in for coffee at 5 in the morning”  Her son was killed in a ambush while leading his section on a ground offensive against the Taliban. This was not his first but his second tour of duty . He left behind a fiance and 2 step children and was due to be married upon his return to his country …and he will never get that chance …he was the same age as I am , this man was 30 and he is dead doing what he believed in and committed to.

So before you say you do not agree with wars and you cannot support the mission in Afghanistan re think what you think and re phrase what you say. You havet he right to disagree with our war in Afghanistan but you do not have the right to not support and show your compassion to these soldiers and their families.

It has been 90 years since world war 1 …90 years we have one veteran left in Canada from that war still alive . John Babcock, he is our last living piece of history to a incredibly brutal and bloody war. HE was a shocking 15 and a half when he tried to sign up to fight in the war …15 and a half people. I believe he is currently 108 years old now. It is men like him that fought for the country we currently live in. It is men like him that took the risk felt the call of duty and did what he thought was the right thing to do at the time. 

So I ask you please honor men like Sergeant Stachnik and John Babcock today. As you do it remember and realize all they have done for us and all they continue to do. They have all made the ultimate sacrifice for what they believe in and for you !

Another Entry On The Bucket List

So I forgot to enter one really important thing on my 10 year bucket list. I want to get a tattoo….in fact have always wanted to get one however deciding is hard and making sure it is right is even harder !!

But I did make a final choice and I am happy with it. I will be getting something in relation to my dad with his name or intials date of birth and when he died and 2 wings. All on my back between shoulder blades and all black and grey

I am going to hold a little competition soon and ask people to submit drawings and see where that gets me. I have a idea in my head what i want it to look like but I want to see what others come up with in regards to that.

Having the tattoo done for dad is perfect and makes complete sense to me. He was and is my moral guidline. His voice is the one I hear when life does not quite roll the way I want it telling me ” I am worthy and to get my chin up keep it up and marh on forward with my life down my path”

It is his voice that reminds me to stay true to myself and to who I am and what I am all about

So the tattoo is the way to go and means a vast and imense amount to me

The Pity Party is OVER !

Yep done , I do not do self pity often and I certianly do not do it long so I have declared it over. All was put into prespective by the lovely Tracey who came and commented on here and gave me the proverbial kick up the backside via the internet lol.

You know I am content with myself and who I am and if someone else feels I am not perfect or right then so be it such is life. It is more their lose then my lose for not taking the chance and for not having the common decency to explain themselves so screw it !

So today I am back on track to being Louisa as my friend Shelly says ” Silly Rabbit” OR her newest name which i think is : Mysterious Vixen” lol lol I am back to shaking my fist at the world and forging my oh so wobbly path through it

 I have a busy busy day ! I am off to the gym to row yet aother 10 km ( sweet lord i cannot feel my arms currently !! ) they also have me doing the lie down thingys where you raise your legs up in the air working your abs while hanging off a bench …..yeah if that sounds painful for you trust me it really is lol ! After that i am off to see my girl and have a good training session on her ! I got my new saddle in yesterday and I am so excited to throw it on her and ride in it. On a side note when I was at my home away from home ( the tack store lol ) I bought a few other things and the one I am in love with most rocks! It is a long sleeved shirt/hoodie with the words Looking 4A Stable Relationship printed on it and a horse …love it ! lol lolo

Alas the day is still not done, I will boogie back home change into something remotely resembling cowboy ( I am a english rider we do not do cowboy ) as I am off the the Canadian Finals Rodeo !! I was given 4 free tickets by a customer from work so I am going. I am taking 3 really great friends one of which is our stable girl and so it is a thank you to her for looking after Sonnet for me so well. After that we are off to Cook County ( oh yes a cowboy bar mechanical bull and all ) So I am living the cowboy life today ! lol

So yep the pity party is over his lose not mine and life roles on merrily

Update: What to do ?!

So have a smallish update on the what to do post …some of you guys know what this is regarding and it is linked to this post

I went with the first option threw caution to the wind and took a chance ….something that is completely out of character for me as a person and was kinda scary to do lol . I am the type of person that lets if ride and see if it works out in the end rather then taking proactive action

Well this time I thought why not buck the trend do the out of the ordinary and take a chance

We shall see what the outcome is I suppose …..it did feel good though to do it !