31 05 2006

Recently I have been traveling to my works office down south in Bracknell ( the center of the world ….. Really its no more like fourth dimension of hell ). Due to the fact that it does not appear Bracknell has any sort of hotel in it I always end up staying outside …. This is good ! Now because of this I have fallen in love with a place down here…. Windsor


Honestly it is the most lovely pretty place ever. It is quiet, it is calm, there are no scallys ( at least none in sight more then likely locked up somewhere ) It is clean and pretty it is perfect. It is also impossible for me to live here due to the fact that it is fucking expensive people!! Seriously you need to be earning proper money to live here. But for some unknown reason that makes me want to live here even more.

See the thing is every street is full of what I would call my ideal English house: They are all lovely cottages and mill houses. They are all terraced ( I do actually like terraces but only the old ones like here because walls are really thick) They have beautiful sash windows and tiny walled front gardens. They are just damned cute!

Every time I am here I go for a walk around the area and must look like a peeping tomette because I just peer through every window as I walk by ( out of jealousy but also because simply I am one nosey cow )
I just like it here the place is nice plus it helps that it seems to be eternally sunny here as well

oh well grass is always greener on the other side isn’t it ?


Crap Telly

24 05 2006

I will be the first to admit that I have a slight issue with crap telly. By that I mean I watch it never endingly to a mind numbing point, its a disease I think ?
My family will fully agree with this. While they watch very little TV I watch never endingly. I may not always be watching it. Sometimes it is just background noise in the flat. But if it is particularly crap telly unlike most people I watch it whole heartily.

Does this make me a fool? Stupid? Or a person with no depth ? HELL NO !!! Society has created this type of TV viewing for a reason. For it to be watched and ultimately talked about by the ‘ water cooler’ I believe it was created for a number of reasons but one sticks out most to me. I think the creators of crap telly did to see how long it would take for it to appear in non tabloid papers and one news worthy ‘educated’ programs. And guess what ? It has everyone !!

The biggest example of this in the UK is Big Brother. I think initially it was the show that was ‘ looked down upon’ a show that is puerile crap and to be fair it was and in most ways still is. But now in its seventh year of running it has broken the mold of tabloid stories and appearing in papers like the independent and The guardian. They are writing serious articles about it and questioning the various issues that are now appearing on this years show.

To me it just proves that society has changed over time to accept these shows as not just ‘ noise in the background’ put it on because there is nothing else to watch. They are watching it to see how human nature works live and uninterrupted ( aside from big brother throwing the housemates the odd curve ball but that’s fun) It is bring up some serious issues otherwise not mentioned like bullying, isolation, stress reactions etc. It is no longer crap telly it is good TV viewing. It is enthralling, at times gripping, extremely funny and more importantly extremely sad as well. This show has everything about human interaction in society in one little house in some sound studio in some set lot somewhere in London. It Works.

Now for the fun … The Housemates! Damn channel 4 has out done themselves this year. As well as sending in the normal ‘ I am destined to be a page 3 girl or a porn king’ they have thrown some really interesting ones in this time. The one that stands out most is Pete. He has tourettes….. Get over it !!! The out cry from the high browed papers that he is being taken advantage of is utterly stupid and if anything insulting to Petes intelligence. He is not stupid he knew what he was doing and what he was going in to and good on him !! The man is bloody marvelous. Aside from that he whistles as one of his ticks and boy he can whistle. Meows when he sees a hot girl ( boy is meowing all the time ) and the best of all he says ‘ wanker’ very randomly to anyone and everyone , irony at its best.

Take a minute watch it guarantee you will get hooked on it

Apparently not that Important after All

19 05 2006

I just received my letter advising me of my pay increase before I tell you what they give me here is the history:
I have worked for this company for 2 years and 2 months I have had a total of a weeks ( 7 days sick ) in that time period. I have come in early and left late. I have taken on extra projects such as the one mentioned below and completed them.

They have given me a amazing 456 pound increase. This works out to after tax each month to £28.00
I can safely say I have never felt so under valued insulted and worthless to a employer as I presently feel. My wish to return to Canada leave this place and never look back has just been reaffirmed ifIi could go right now I would. I would get on a plan and fuck off

Yes I am Important … I think

19 05 2006

I have been given a new mission at work: Go sort out the staff in our office down south ( I will not name where down south as I have never named who I work for for fear of it biting me back in the ass so office down south will be known as TSO = The shit office )

When I was given the mission by my big head cheese boss I was thinking hmm piece of piss this mission : make the staff do their jobs the right way , follow procedures stop cocking up etc.

I was wrong

I have spent two days at the TSO and felt as though everything I said to them was listened to but not complete taken on board. I got the feeling that as I was saying all this vital ( and extremely important ) information they were thinking in their heads ‘ Ah she leaves tomorrow so does not matter if we do what she says’ I noticed this on the first day. When I was in my hotel room that night I thought of a cunning plan to get them to listen … I would threaten them!! ha ha
So yesterday morning I informed them that over the next week I would be running daily reports and that if I saw any errors I would come down on them like a ton of very angry Canadian bricks . I am now hoping this is going to work but not holding my breath.

Part of the problem is that I am just a normal worker ( non management ) and I am basically going into a office and not only telling other normal workers how to sort themselves out but the office manager. How do I do that without making the situation worse??? Not easy is it ?!

So that is what I am doing for the foreseeable future ( no end date has been given to me ) I will keep you up to date on the boringness of my life at present which I am sure will make for thrilling reads for you all
Will attempt to spice it up but its pretty hard to be honest ha ha !!

My successful Attempts of De- Hermitization

15 05 2006

I have had successful social attempts at de-hermitting myself, so proud …. So proud.

On Friday I went out with one of my closest friends Mason. Mason is a true gentlemen a star and a genuinely nice and kind person. He is also slightly off kilter and his wife Emma has the patience of a bloody saint as far as I am concerned!

He is also a brilliant painter. I am still pestering him for a Mason Banks painting and I will get one before ai leave this island ! He is 40 well almost 40 ( so love rubbing int he fact that he is almost 40) so yeah he rocks basically.
We went out to Chorlton and promised each other that we would not get pissed that we would be responsible adults. We were out by 4 and halfway to pissed by half 4 !! However we did not get stupid pissed make a full of yourself drunk. It was lovely have to say was really nice to get out with Mason and talk about some seriously mind altering intelligent stuff ( this intelligent talk only happens once and a while for me as otherwise my brain would explode due to overload of info)

Then Saturday came round. I had made the decsion that I would take it easy as I had overloaded myself with social things on Friday and did not want to push my luck. I went to the gym for the first time in a week ( cold = bad bad breathing = no gym what so ever ! ) I went hell for leather and loved every minute of it !! I miss the gym when I am not there. I actually miss the feeling of pushing myself that little bit further each time. Trying to see if I can do better then the previous visit. And that was what I did on this visit suffered for it mind you but loved it.
I got a message from my great gym buddy Tracey saying come over tonight share a bottle and help me pack for the big move . Was very very tempted to say no but gave myself a shake and thought screw it out you go Lou. Jesus had a great time !!! Went to hers had the bottle and then Tracey suggested that we go to the local social club as Colin her husband was behind the bar and well lets face it was bloody cheap as well.
I met Colins mum ….. I was scared honestly terrified . She reminded me of the mother of the bad guys in ‘The Goonies’ seriously she was scary !!
So yeah for once I had a active weekend was well chuffed with myself . Drank to much but oh well was worth it.

A Few Things I am Hating Right Now …

11 05 2006

I am hating hayfever !!! i have never had such aweful hayfever as I do now. My head feels like it is going to explode. What makes it worse is that I only just got over the deadly cold. I got this false sense of happiness when the cold cleared off last night. Then I woke up this morning and bang welcome to my world Mr Hayfever!!!

I am hating people who do not get back in touch just do normally it does not bother me because I am one of the worst offenders for not calling people back. I leave my phone on silence all the time so I actually miss all my calls ( I know I am now going to get hate mail from various friends and family about this weird tick of mine ) But yeah people who do not get back to you …. Really fucking me off right now

Yep that’s about it for now. To be fair there is a hell of a lot more I am hating at present however to avoid opening the 5th dimension of hell and letting it ALL come out I am restraining myself ( does not happen often just so you know )

Fairly sure I am dying

8 05 2006

I have a cold.
I am sure this is gods way of natural selection.
I wish to curl up in the fetal position and die right now.
My customers are all making fun of my nasal like tones right now and have absolutely no sympathy
yep I am going to die because of a cold !!
this truly sucks