Hey Lurkers …Yep Talking to you ! :-)

13 11 2008

 So I know your visiting I can see your countries flag there in the side bar ( which is soooo freakin cool by the way ! )

So thanks for the visit but drop me a line make a comment ! I promise you I will not bite and scare you …cross my heart !

I have had visits from some really off the wall places recently so I want to hear from you !! I can see which posts you read and which ones get read the most as well….seriously say hi even …yes I am attention starved sorry ! lol


The Decade to Come …My 10 Year Bucket List

30 10 2008

It has been noted that I am struggling with the whole I am turning or turned 30 today. It has been the first birthday I have ever had major issues with …but whatever I will deal with it I am a tough girl ( as my bones turn to powder and I become OLD !!! )

 So rather the then go down the route of regret for things not done in my 20’s and rather then feeling sorry for myself and coming to the quick realization that I am old I have decided I need to set up a 10 year bucket list. I need a list of things I want to do and accomplish over the next 10 years. Everyone wants different things, everyone wants to experince thrills and spills and so here is my list.

  1. Go scuba diving at the Great Barrier Reef
  2. Go to Rio de Janerio for Carnival
  3. Love unconditionally and be loved unconditionally
  4. Find my soul mate and best friend
  5. Go to Africa !
  6. Quit Smoking ( yes I know I have to do this either way )
  7. Run some sort of marathon or half marathon
  8. Learn to row properly and join a team to do it regularly
  9. Go to a NHL hockey Game
  10. Go to a international Rugby match ( yes already done this but loved it )
  11. Buy a home and make a home for myself
  12. …..possibly get married ? lol lol
  13. Go to the Maldives
  14. Show in 3rd level dressage
  15. Buy a second horse primarely for Jumping only ( a boy horse 🙂 )
  16. Go back to Australia and New Zealand

Ok so thats it for now it is a small list and I will add to it I am sure but those are some of the things want to accomplish over the next 10 years if possible

The past Decade in Short Form

29 10 2008

 I am in the last 24 hours of my 20’s …..I am so clinging onto it with all my might. Tomorrow I turn 30 and tomorrow is the start of a new decade for me. So I thought in honor of this milestone ( which as a side note it is soooo not it is actually getting old dammit ) I would go over the most influential parts of my life over this last decade.

 I entered my 20’s in a state of heartbreak and turmoil. My dad had passed away 2 months prior to my 20th birthday so to be frank I have no memory of what it was I did to celebrate my 20Th and frankly it really does not matter because it is likely to best describe my state of mind at that time as angry and bitter from losing him. I am strangely enough entering my 30’s not in heart breakbut something similar which is a slightly empty feeling. Now do not get me wrong I am beyond happy with who I am and who I have become but none the less I still feel empty sometimes or possibly even lonely.

 I spent the better part of my 20’s in a different country with a different life and with the most amazing people I could have met. I was 21 when I left for the UK and 27 when I came back to Canada so the majority of the last decade was in the UK. I can say hands down it was the best thing I ever did for myself. I had to learn how to lookafter myself completely. I had to learn how to deal with all the things life would throw at me. I had to deal with utter betrayalfrom a relationship which ended due to cheating. If you have never been through something like that I will describe it to you …crushing and debilitating, it sucked the faith out of me that people could have a true and honest relationship. It turned me into a angry and bruised girl. But there is light at the end of that disaster always and you need to know if you are going through it now that it does in fact get better and you do in fact learn from it which is what I did.

I established a career in my last decade which is a hard thing to explain. Best way to describe it is project management. The point is I am good at it and I learnt how to do it in my 20’s. To anyone in their early 20’s now and thinking “I have no idea what I am going to do ! ” Now is the time to figure it out and to carve your path in life. Set yourself up now so that when you get into the next decade you have a direction and purpose in life

 My 20’s was my time to understand what the meaning of true friendship is and how to keep it and cherish it. I met one of my 2 best friends in my 20’s and even now thinking about it tears me up and makes me so grateful. I met Mason when I was 22 and loud and full of myself. He hated me when he first layed eyes on me…said I was loud and in your face. Now in my 30’s he loves me for it ! he taught me that it is ok to rely on friends and to lean on them in times of need and pain and for that I am forever grateful and he is one of the reasons my 20’s turned out so damn well. Miss seeing him every day dearly but think about him every day and know in my heart he is one of the best friends a person could wish for. In my late 20’s I reconnected with my oldest and dearest friend Aron. After a 10 year gap she reappeared and will never ever go away. She reminds me to be me and she makes me feel worthy as a person. So see friendship wise the 20’s are likely going to be my most influential time I think

 The biggest thing I can take away from the last decade is that I know who I am I know where I am going and I know it is right. I know that it is ok to love fiercely and without binds. I know that people will never always accept you for you but ..who cares all that matters is that I accept me for me. I know now I am stunning and radiant and beautiful inside and out, it took at least 7 years of my 20’s for realize that and now I will hang on to it for life. I know that you will always have to make the tough and heart wrenching decisions in life and you must make them or you are a coward. I now know I can stand on my own to feet and do it well. I can look up towards the sky on a sunny day and smile and look back and think …I have lead a amazing life thus far and it can only get better and better

I may be entering my 30’s with a slightly empty or lonely feeling but I know for a fact I am entering it with friends like Aron who make me feel worthy and friends like Mason who remind me I am stunning and with a family who reminds me I am loved wanted and a much valued part of their lives

So bring it on 30’s lets see what the next decade brings my way. Lets see if it will be as wild a ride as the last decade has been for me

Bye 20’s you will be remembered missed and loved