There is Nothing More I Dislike then Being Ignored

26 11 2008

Seriously nothing pisses me off more then being ignored, not spoken to, not responded to or the silent treatment !

It honestly rattles my cage something chronic ! I am a communicator I need that form of communication and so when someone and others do not do the common act of communicating back then I get irritated to the max level.

I have no idea why it is like this with me but it is. I am pretty good at keeping my emotions and feelings and anger in check in almost all situations but when it comes to this little tiny issue I struggle not to scream about it.

I just have this belief that if someone makes the effort to speak to you then you simply make that effort back. I also believe that if you cannot be bothered to make that effort then you are way less a person for it. I know friends say to me if someone is that ignorant or rude then they are not worth your time anger or effort. That they are not worthy enough to know me as a person…but I cannot help it it gets my goat dammit.

So in the future people take the tip from me : If someone makes the effort to speak, email, text, call or write you a letter even make the effort to respond back its not hard and is just simple common manners dammit


People I Admire

26 11 2008

There are 2 blogs I read with alarming regularity right now. They are both women who give me such a sense of hope and happiness when I read what they write. So I came to the line of thought that I need to give these two women a big shout out and explain why I love their blogs so damn much


 The first one is Kristen over at Our Army Life. This is a a blog I found actually via the secret Ornament swap abbilyeverafterputs on at xmas each year. Kristen is the wife of Zach and he has just begun his basic training in the US army this month. She has kindly decided to share her fears hopes and feelings on her blog about his absence in her life, her longing to have him back and her life and love for him. I really love going over to her little corner of the net and reading about her letters she sends to Zach and the letters and phone calls he sends and makes to her. Her story gives me hope that yes in fact through it all love truly does make a vast difference in ones life. Go over and show her your support and give her the encouragement she needs…Zach is back home from training in less then a month for the holidays and you can literally feel her vibrate with excitement at the thought through the Internet …its sweet lol

The second one is a wow blog. This is a love story and a half. This is a story that had me in tears when I read through it from start to finish . It is Stephanie over at The Road Less Travelled. Stephanie and her husband Sidnei have been through the mill and back again. Their love has been tested in such a way that others cannot even begin to imagine or wish upon another. The story is long and all I can say is go over there and read it from start to finish to get the full blown scope of what has happened to them. The basics is that Sidnei is from Brazil , they were married and went away on honeymoon. Upon returning from the honeymoon Sidnei was detained for not having a passport or paper work basically to get back into the US. Stephanie had to heartbreakingly leave her husband in jail in peurto rico and fly back to the states. The kicker to all this ….is he is still in that jail and has been there since March people. While he sits in Jail she fights with the powers that are immigration to get her husband back to her and her home and her heart.

Please go over and offer her nothing but support and encouragement. She is one of those rare people that shows you true love exists that your heart is what drives you froward each and every single day

So those are my 2 blogs of note right now. They are the ones I read to remind myself that life is not that bad, they remind me love does happen and it is so very important to a persons well being and state of mind

Best friends, Close Friends and Acquaintances

22 08 2007

You know I like to keep my friends close to me. But also I like to havea small friend base. This is solely for the reason that I can then spend and give more attention to the people that mean the most to me.
There are a few that will always stand out heads and shoulders above the rest by a million miles.
Firstly there is Mason which you have all heard about. Mason is one of the few people that I truly let my gaurd down with and well let it out. He also is the one person who can wind me up to no end and knows exactly what button to push to get that hieghtened reaction out of. God he is good at that lol
Amanda was one of my closest friends in the UK. She can make me giggle like no one !! Seriously she does not even need to speak she just needs to look at me and I am in fits. She was there with me through bad break ups with boyfriends. She was there when I was homesick and so fed up. The girl is down to earth and just rocks.

Last but not least Aron. I have known Aron since the age of 3. Yes 3!! We used to rule the monkey bars at Blueberry community hall. We were thick and fast friends. We went through Elementry to High School together. She was popular but never ever rude or discerning upon who she was friends with and I was quiet slightly picked on and really did not mix with school people. We shared and share a strong common bond of a love of horses, the magnificent beasts they are. I actually rode Arons old horse before she bought him ( that horse rocked my world) We drifted apart. She got married ( then divorced) I left the country and tried to find out who I was. 10 years later we got back in touch and you know it was like it had only been 10 hours since we had last spoken. I deeply regret not being here as a friend when she went through rough times such a big regret on that. Aron is one of the few people that can throw a compliment my way and I know it is truly from the heart and genuine! She is one of the most stunning women I know in the world yet she is NEVER big headed about it and I love her for that. She is by far one of the best horsewomen I have ever come across and I am envious ( not in a bad way ) of that. But most of all she is a true and beautiful friend
She has these great quotes on her facebook so thought I would write down my 2 favs of hers

” Turn your face to the sun and let the shadows fall behind you”
” Remember there are oceans between us……but thats not very far”

If you Love Something and Let it Go …..

20 08 2007

Have you ever figured out after the fact that you love someone and it is possibly to late? I have.
I have however the belief that all things happen for a reason. I am also of the belief that if you do let someone you love go then eventually they will come back to you in one form or another.

I am generally not a overly sentimental person. I tend to steam roll over most things when concerning affairs of the heart. I suppose it is my way of dealing with being or potenially being hurt or destroyed. I am not very good at dealing with the not so nice aspects of life. I am like bird sticking her head in the sand praying things go away. This time I have realized I cannot deal with things like this.
Do I tell people from now on and forever how I feel about them? Do I pour my heart out or do I keep that brick wall up and again pray for the best? I do not honestly know the answer to that yet.

I do know that I still have a heart I still have feelings and I can still love endlessly if I let myself. One thing I will attempt not to do is drown in saddness and self pity. If things are meant to be then things will happen for me and if they do not then that is life and fate.
So yes maybe I do believe in the old saying of
” If you love something let it go. If it loves you it will return”
Just maybe that will happen to me …who knows

What I Did On My Summer Holidays

19 08 2007
So I am back all ( yeah there are like 2 of you that actually read and even then no one comments. But the blog helps in keeping my sanity sometimes ) I am posting twice today a happy happy post and a slightly down post. So getting the happy one done first …like to see you all flop in depression when you come off the high of a happy one lol )
I will be writing regularly now as think I really need to so I can get things off my chest and well just sound off.
So on with the happy happy post all. My best friend in the world has been over here from Peterborough for the last 3 weeks and I can safely say that they were some of the best 3 weeks of my life. We took him to our house on the west coast on Saltspring island. He fell in love with it. I am fairly sure he did not want to leave. Plus the trip made me fall in love with Saltspring all over again. See this is the place where mum will retire to when she sells the house here in Alberta. It pains me to think about the house being sold but after spending time on the island the pain slightly eased up.
So I am going to attach pics for you all to see:
Our beach at sunset. love it here very pretty and calm
We took a seaplane to Vancouver sooo cool
Mase giving evils to yet another pic !

“i cush your head” canadians will get this from kids in the hall Bro George and friend Allan stargazing on beach

The top of Mt. Maxwell looking out over Gulf Islands

Mase and I on the deck of Saltspring house

The entire group of us on a night out together

You know it is BAD when Your Mother is concerned about your " Dating Life" or Lack of One

15 06 2007
So my mum recently informed me that she was “concerned” about my “social” life which translates to by ” Dating” life.
I am a bit of a odd person when it comes to dating. I love having a boyfriend however I dread dread the work you have to put in to finding one. Possibly because I fear rejection. So my simple solution is not to bother. This sounds defeatist but really its not. I do like my life as a single person. I am a solitary creature to begin with. I also do not handle having to ” answer” to someone well. I am a feircely independent girl so when it comes to relationships I tend to be distant at times but not in a bad way though.
So I have dated every type of guy: The Cheater – strangely enough my most sucessful relationship that is until the cheating of course
The Mummy’s boy: that was just to much for me to handle
The Cheap boy: seriuously every little thing was split right down to when he went to buy our weekly sunday papers. He would request the 85 pence it cost him. I have no issue paying in fact prefer to pay however when it is demanded of me and when the person is as tight fisted as a nuns ass I take issue with that !
The way to nice for his own good: CLINGY is the only word to describe it !! I cannot handle clingy !!
So yeah she brought this up and I thought well I am going to have to sort this situation out. I do not go out bar hopping really plus I would never pick someone up at the bar. I would likely not date anyone from work ( although they are hot and they make a piss load of money …not that it matters really but its nice) My friend base is limited due to the fact that I have been out of the country for like 6 years so I do not have the base I used to have.
SOOOO I joined up with Eharmoney. Now I chose them because it was not like other dating sites. Basically they put me through barge of questions for my personality test. Then only they see my profile. They match me up with like minded similar people. I am liking it. I have been talking to a few guys and one in particular who seems really nice.
I have not put my picture up as I have this irrational fear that they would run in terror when seeing my pic. It is silly I realize. But due to the fact that I am not a teeny tiny girl, a cheerleader nor a barbie doll I think they will just not bother then…I may be right or wrong on that one who knows.
So I will chat and after a number of emails I will then offer to email a picture through. I have had a few ego dents of them not coming back to me ( WOW that stung) but you know what I am tough girl and big girl. I do not know them from adam so no skin off my nose.
They can make assumptions all they want. Little do they know that I used to BIGGER !! lol anbd that I worked my ass off to lose 85 pounds so thats gotta be good.
So I will keep plugging away at it and who knows something may come of it something may not hard to tell really.
I of course will keep you posted on all future sucesses with my foray into the dreaded dating world ( why cant’ I just order a mail order groom?? )
Here as a final note is the picture that I do send when I eventually send it

Amanda ( georges ex), George my little Bro, ME !! and my lovely mum